Monthly Archives: October 2011

Why Black People Can’t Be Racist

It seems some of you honkies don’t understand my contention that black people cannot be racist. What kind of reverend would I be if I weren’t here to educate you crackers on these matters. So I propose to drop some truth bombs on your white asses with this post.

To understand why blacks cannot be racist, you first have to understand racism. Merriam-Webster Online defines racism as:

1) a belief that race is the primary determinant of human traits and capacities and that racial differences produce an inherent superiority of a particular race

2) racial prejudice or discrimination

The problem is that Mr. Merriam, and Mr. Webster are both white, and their definition of racism is intentionally narrow so as to further promote white supremacy. Racism is not, as whitey would have you believe, the belief that one race is superior to another. Racism is an institution in this country. Racism is Amerikkka.

In Amerikkka, white people run everything. They control the government. They control the banks. They control education. It is this white omnipresence that defines racism.

Only white people can turn their feelings towards blacks into action. Schools, run by white people, fail blacks disproportionately. The police, run by white people, arrest and imprison blacks disproportionately. Banks, run by white people, force black people into taking loans they can’t afford keeping them perpetually indebted to crackers. It is the power to turn thoughts into action that makes white people inherently racist.

Black people don’t run anything. Black people have no money. They have no control. They have no power. They have no authority. Blacks can hate honkies, but they can do little else than call crackers hurtful names. Blacks can’t set government policy. It is the lack of black power that absolves blacks of any hateful feelings they may harbor. They cannot turn their feelings towards whites into action.

Racism is not about hating people of other races. Racism is about having power over other races, and using that power to keep them subservient. Since black people have no power in Amerikkka, it is impossible for black people to be racists.

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Posted by on October 29, 2011 in Uncategorized


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What do you think of the new look? Does it accurately convey the blackness that is this site?


Posted by on October 28, 2011 in Uncategorized


Not All White People Are Racist

You would think during the reign of the first black president this would go without saying. Even a supercharged bigot like the good Rev. Dr. Swift has to be able to admit that. President Obama would not be ‘President” if white people did not vote for him in large numbers. Unless, of course you believe those crazy conspiracy theories that groups like ACORN committed voter fraud on a large enough scale that most white people did not have to vote for him. Or even better, that the JOOOOOZ just had him installed like they do every president.

But I digress.

You would think in a day and age where white people send humongous ass-tons of money to Africa for AIDS research, white people would not have to defend themselves against the kind of outlandish accusations that our good reverend and doctor likes to throw about. I’m sure our magnanimous host believes that white people invented AIDS, and have a cure stashed away that’s just for white people and Magic Johnson.

One would expect that in an era where black people are afforded affirmative action in every aspect of work and education that people could finally stop cowering in fear of being outed as a racist just because they believe the most qualified person should get a job, or entrance to a university. Sadly that’s not the case. Race hustlers like Swift believe that stuff is owed to them and their people because some ancient ancestor was owned by some dude that died two hundred years ago. To quote Dr. Evil, “Boo Fricketty Hoo.”

That’s why I took this post as Swift’s house cracker. Somebody needs to pierce that tool’s ignorance. Somebody has to at least try to interject some common sense into this sea of swirling idiocy. Race relations ain’t that hard. If everybody would just quit their incessant whining, we may be able to move towards a future where there is no government run plantation, or instant societal death for any white person that dares to speak out about it.

Rev. Dr. Swift’s Response

First, I ain’t no bigot, boy. Second, I admit nothing, deny everything, and make counter-accusations. Third, it’s the Jews I tell ya! Fourth, you didn’t know whitey invented AIDS and have a cure stashed away that’s just for whitey and Magic Johnson? Here’s a video that proves it. Fifth, of course you owe me. Sixth, everyone is treated as an equal here, Honkey McCrackerson.


Posted by on October 27, 2011 in Uncategorized


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A New Employee

Lately, I’ve been getting some hate mail claiming that I am an ignorant racist. Some of my more sensitive readers say that I insult crackers too much, and that I shouldn’t be so hostile. I tried explaining to them that I cannot be racist because I am black. I try to explain to them only non-blacks can be racist, but those bitches don’t listen. Probably a bunch of honkies anyway.

Well, even though I am not racist, I am going to offer an olive branch to the honkies just to show my good will. I have decided to hire a token cracker to balance things out around here. Since this is my blog, I told him he couldn’t blog under his own name, and I gave him a name that I like better. His screen name will be Honkey McCrackerson. At least he didn’t make me whoop him in front of all the other crackers when I gave it to him.

So Honkey will be writing some of his own posts around here. We may even write a few collaborative posts. Keep checking back, or subscribe, or follow me on Twitter because Honkey will be writing an introductory post soon. Stay black, my niggers.


Posted by on October 27, 2011 in Uncategorized


Drug Addicts: It’s Not Your Fault

I want to talk to my brothers who are struggling with drug addiction. I know there are a disproportionate number of black people hooked on drugs. I want you to know its not your fault.

The fact that more black people are drug addicts than white people is a clear sign of the systemic racism that still exists in Amerikkka. That’s an irrefutable fact. It can’t be argued.

Black people, it’s not your fault you are addicted to drugs. In fact, I am surprised that more black people are not addicted to drugs. The difficulties of black life in Amerikkka make it nearly impossible to just get through the day without some sort of help. Just think about how much more difficult your life is due to racism.

You have to pay bills imposed on you by some cracker. You probably have a car note because some honkey sold you a car you couldn’t really afford by aggressive and racist marketing techniques. Then you have to have insurance that you can’t afford because some ofay politicians passed law mandating it. You can’t afford that shit, so you let it lapse. Then some racist cop tows your car and writes a ticket because you don’t have insurance.

Now, you have to pay a ticket, a tow bill, and have your insurance reinstated just to get your car back. Because you had to pay for all that institutional racism, you’re behind on your car note. Along comes the racist repo man to take your car back for the bank.

That’s just the circle of racism that goes into vehicle ownership for a black man. The government won’t help you because all the racists hang together. You feel outnumbered and surrounded. Then the white man introduces drugs in the hood. How could you not smoke a rock or shoot some heroine after a day like that?

So you see, my drug addicted brothers and sisters, addiction is not your fault. The white man has stacked the deck against you by giving you loans you can’t afford, passing laws that make you pay for extra stuff, and enforcing laws that disproportionately affect black people. The white man invented drugs knowing that black people would look for a way to escape from the racist reality of their lives.

I know some white people are drug addicts, but they’re just lazy, shiftless, trash that couldn’t take advantage of their white privilege. Fuck them.

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Posted by on October 27, 2011 in Uncategorized


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Irrefutable Proof Conservatives Are Racists

Yeah, I know what you all are thinking. You already know that Conservatives are racists, and you don’t need any evidence to back that up. You all have your own reasons for your belief that Conservatives are racists from policy positions, to that one time when you were a kid and some Conservative repossessed your auntie’s car. I get it. However, I am about to provide you rock solid proof that no one can dispute, and it will be able to shut down any argument to the contrary.

What is this shocking, iron clad proof of Conservative racism, you ask? Is it that Mitt Romney’s fishing camp is known to locals as Niggerlegs? No. Is it that Rick Perry keeps a black man in the cargo hold of his private plane to keep all his shoes appropriately shined. No. Could it be that Ron Paul is known throughout the ghettos of Texas as “James the Nigger Hating Doctor?” No, that’s not it either.

While I wouldn’t be surprised if any of the above were true, I have no proof of those things as of yet, but I am working on it. No, this evidence would trump all those things even if we could prove beyond all doubt that they were true (though I am not saying they are not). The evidence is this:

Herman Cain

That’s right, the token negro in the Republican presidential primary is the foremost evidence to prove the argument that Conservatives are racists. Racists would claim that the participation of Cain in the GOP primary, and his position at the top of the polls proves that Conservatives are not racists. I believe that Cain proves that racism is the foremost motivation of Conservatives, not a minority belief held by some fringe elements hiding amongst Conservatives.

Herman Cain is the B-2 Stealth Bomber of the Amerikkkan Conservative. Herman Cain can lob long distance racism bombs at black people that would cause the political death of the average Conservative. Herman Cain strafes black people with racism and Conservatives lap it up. He was brought in to the primary to make racist statements and it’s this racism that motivates “the base”. It’s his racism resonating with the average Conservative voter’s racism that has catapulted him to the top of the polls.

There are other racists that would claim that the GOP does not represent Conservatives. Those racists believe that Herman Cain is not a Conservative, and doesn’t speak for Conservatives. Those Conservatives are racists too because they refuse to support a black man.


Posted by on October 24, 2011 in Uncategorized


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Bryant Gumble Down for the Struggle

Bryant Gumble, possibly the whitest black man in Amerikkka, recently upped his blackness quotient when he compared NBA Commissioner David Stern to a “plantation overseer.” The comment obviously implies that NBA players are slaves. I am sure most of you honkies out there are appalled at the comparison, but let me assure you it is a valid one.

To understand Gumble’s comments you have to shed your cracker perceptions and honkey world view. You have to look past the pretty packaging and ribbons that are meant to keep viewers from seeing the racism inherent in the sports world. You need to look deeper than the fact that NBA players make millions of dollars, drive fancy cars, and live in big houses. You have to look past the fact that the NBA markets individual players like Lebron James, Kobe Bryant, and Chris Paul over their teams. All of these facts are smokescreens designed to distract from the ugly truth buried within the NBA: That the NBA is nothing more than a modern day plantation exploiting black men.

Once you have successfully shed your whiteness, you can begin to look at the NBA, and see how it can be compared to a plantation. One recent, widely publicized example of racism in the NBA is David Stern instituting a dress code for players. Seeing as how the NBA is overwhelmingly black, you would think Stern would tailor this dress code accordingly. Maybe make sure that all baggy pants be picked from a group of respected name brands. Or possibly make sure that players watches, chains, rings, and bracelets match. Those things would make sense, but no. Stern decided that the NBA players should dress like white people, and that is totally unacceptable.

Another recent, well publicized example of systemic racism in the NBA is the reaction of fans and Dan Gilbert to Lebron James “taking his talents to South Beach.” The venom that began to slung ofter that free agent signing resembled what would happen if the Grand Wizard of the KKK’s wife leaving him for Malcolm X. Dan Gilbert, the owner of Cleveland Cavaliers, got all pissed off and wrote an open letter calling Lebron “heartless” and “disloyal” just like he was some sort of slave owner beating a runaway slave. David Stern did fine Gilbert for the letter, and was quoted as saying so-called super teams like the Miami Heat were good for the league, but Stern is a Jew. We know you can’t take anything a Jew says at face value.

Any sane individual who has successfully shed his white mindset must conclude after seeing the evidence that the NBA is nothing more than a modern day plantation. Sure, there are no beatings, killings, chains, poverty, or forced selective breeding, but there is plenty of oppression. Sure NBA players make millions and have the leverage to play where they want, but they can’t switch teams without being called names by fans and their former owners. I think once Occupy Wall Street is done on Wall Street, they should occupy the NBA offices until these plantation conditions are ended.


Posted by on October 20, 2011 in Uncategorized


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